I Swear to God, It Isn’t Mine

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When I saw the package sticking out of the mailbox, I groaned aloud. I had been traveling for the past week on business; I was tired, sore, and desperate for a good night’s sleep. It looked like I wasn’t going to get it. Work had obviously caught up with me. Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I strode over to the mailbox and ripped open the package. I gave only a cursory glance at the name on the address. What I found inside made my breath catch in the back of my throat. It wasn’t… it wasn’t what I had been expecting.It was an Aneros, an anal sex toy that was designed (and specifically marketed) as a hands-free prostate stimulator. Meaning, of course, that it was a sex toy intended for use by men. One of my ex-girlfriends had bought one for me years ago; that’s how I knew what it was. I had never actually used the toy, nor had I planned to. I had been mortified to receive it as a gift. What the hell is something like this doing in my mailbox? Was it a mistake?Curious, I took another look at the address. My eyes widened when I saw the truth, and I started to laugh out loud.Fucking hell, this is Keegan’s package!As I said before, I had been traveling for the past week on business. It was my job to organize the local teen competitors for their run at the Wado-Ryu Karate Provincials in Vancouver. Among the usual headaches of organizing a tournament run, I had to deal with an unwanted change in my responsibilities as a Karate teacher. Keegan Holloway had moved into the other half of my duplex eight months ago. He was a strange kid, but he had a second degree-black belt, the same as mine. He had been invited to join the Karate Club as an auxiliary instructor in exchange for regular use of the dojo, and about a month ago he took over my position as the Junior Adult Instructor.I had the chance to sit in on one Tüyap escort bayan of his lessons once. By the end of it, I knew that the others had made the right decision. He had the skills to back up our faith in him. I didn’t want to admit it, but he was exactly what our club had needed. I resented him for the change, but the fact of his talent had forced me to consider that he might have been the better teacher. If I wanted my job back, I was going to have to earn it back by brushing up on my own skills. I thought that I might be able to do that by devoting myself to the new position, but the improvement of the teen class presented its own set of problems.Living so close to one another made it impossible to go about my day without seeing him. Like it or not, Keegan was a regular figure in my life. I tried not to see him as a living reminder, but it was difficult. In addition to sharing a space at the dojo, we shared the same grocery store. I once caught him using my laundromat, but I managed to sneak out before he noticed me. We – very nearly – share the same name, which is probably how the Aneros toy ended up in my mailbox.Having my mail delivered to the wrong address was actually quite the common thing. I could believe that I had received a package intended for Keegan, but something like this? This was a real oddity, and it was way too good to pass up. I decided that I was going to give the toy back to him. Someone else might have thought that this would humiliate me, as well as Keegan. I wasn’t really worried about that. It didn’t matter to me that I had gone and opened it, because he was the one who had gone and bought it. Thinking about it, I laughed aloud again. Won’t this be humiliating? I had promised myself that I wasn’t going to make Keegan into a rival, Tüyap escort but I couldn’t deny the pleasure I got in the prospect of embarrassing him. His face was always so… stoic. It would be interesting to see it change.I waited for Keegan to return home from his lesson before I made the first move. At 7:30, I knocked on the door.He took his time answering. He must not have been expecting anyone. When he saw my face, his expression softened. “Oh, it’s you.” he said.”Yeah. It’s me.” I replied, instantly irritated. “I’m not your friend, Keegan. I’m just here to give you your mail.””Right. Anything good?” he asked, clearly unperturbed by my temper.”Couple bills,” I replied offhandedly, handing them to him. “There was also a package with your name on it. It was pretty badly wrapped. You might want to file some kind of complaint with the manufacturer.””Where is it?” he asked, frowning. This was going to be good.”It snagged on a nail and ripped open,” I lied, grinning, “You’ll never guess what fell out!”I had been holding the Aneros package behind my back while we talked. I held it out to him, and he snatched it away before I could finish speaking. He was blushing harder than I had ever seen a man blush. He tried to stammer out an explanation.”I-I ordered that for a friend of mine!” he stammered, obviously lying. “His parents are monitoring his credit card use, so he asked me t-to…”Bullshit! “You got that for a friend?” I asked, grinning at him, “That sure is nice of you; considering it’s something he’s gonna stick up his ass.” I didn’t think it was possible, but he blushed even harder. I leered at him, causing him to take a step back into the apartment. I stuck my head through the doorway, pretending to look for the unnamed friend. “So where is he? I wanna meet this friend Escort Tüyap who trusts you so much.””It’s none of your business who it is,” he replied coldly, “I want you to leave now.”I looked at him with as much insolence as I could muster, but he had regained his composure. This is no fun. If he wanted me to leave, I had no doubt that he could force me. I wasn’t in this for a fight. I was just enjoying myself, getting under his skin for a change.”All right, keep your secrets.” I replied. As soon as I took my head out of the doorway, he slammed it shut. Fucking hell, was it really that bad? Can’t you stand losing the high ground for a change? I was shaking with laughter. That was a lot better than I thought it would be, but I wasn’t done yet. I made some plans, but it was another two days before I had an opportunity to tease Keegan again. He was sitting outside a cafe with Sensei Corrigan, one of the other black belts from the Karate Club. They hadn’t seen me yet, so I crossed the street and called attention to myself. Corrigan greeted me with a smile and a friendly wave, but Keegan was nervous. He stammered out a ‘hello’.”Hey, Keegan,” I asked suddenly. I didn’t bother to lower my voice. “Is this him? That friend?”Keegan was visibly shocked, “What? No! What the fuck are you-“I cut him off, “Oh, my bad. See you around!”As an added bonus, I heard Corrigan ask Keegan what I was talking about. I was out of earshot too quickly to hear what Keegan told him. I would love to know what he came up with! I thought, shaking with laughter. I could do this for the rest of my life and it would never get old.He recovered a lot sooner than I’d have liked. The day after the encounter outside the cafe, he approached me at the dojo and asked if we could speak privately. I didn’t know what his game was yet, but I wanted him to try it. I wasn’t going to give up the high ground so soon. I formulated a plan, and then told him to visit me at my apartment that evening.He knocked on my door at 8, and I let him inside. He was hesitant to speak, so I invited him into my kitchen and offered him a stiff drink.

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